The Dig

Part 12

Update 12: Wark, Motherfucker, Do You Speak It?

Normally you only do this at the beginning of an LP, but here's the video that invalidates my entire update:

Video

Manikind's first encounter with an intelligent alien species. Our first words should be something profound.

: I wish I didn't keep thinking of the term 'Bite-size.' Please be friendly. I hope you're friendly. I'm certainly friendly. Let's all be friends.

: Aklash pahk.

: I'm Boston Low, and I got two crew members around here somewhere and we're stuck here and we need help.

: Nyok na judsta zho.

: Could you maybe speak slower? And maybe in some language I understand? Of course that's pretty much limited to English.

: Ieea klatsek- klatsek sta.

: Oo-day oo-yay eak-spay ig-pay atin-lay?

: Nyok na judsta zho.

: How does it feel again to be alive after all these years? I can't believe I said something so lame.

: Glhagh tu sia nayieea umd.

: Look, can you give me any information about how my crew and I can get back to Earth? That's E-A-R-T-H, third planet from a smallish yellow star which is somewhere -- out there -- in space?

: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.

: Earthman go home! Get it?

: Lahum stchiadnak tresto luum.

: You are Oz, the great and powerful. I ain't got no ruby slippers, but I still want to get home.

: Nyok na judsta zho.

: If all I wanted to do was stand around and shout nonsense at somebody, I could have run for Congress!

: Lahum stchiadnak tresto luum.

: Well hey, thanks, it's been great talking to you, so long. We should do this again sometime.

: Lahum stchiadnak tresto luum.